
Have you ever felt nigga'd out? Sure you have, I'll elaborate:
You know, you wake up feeling good, but then you get in your car and it all goes downhill. All the music is about bending you over, getting money, how hard someone is (literally and figuratively), and all sorts of other things that, although you couldn't make out all the country slang, you're pretty sure were obscene.
You go to get your blah blah latte mocha thing and a sista with beautiful braids greets you with a smirk and an eyeroll. You apparently have caught her in the midst of a very juicy text messaging session with her friend. You apologize for interrupting.
Next, you go to your local state agency to do some routine transaction like renew your license or apply for a business license and the customer service rep, a young black man who badly needs his cornrows re-done, acts like you are disturbing him by asking for his help. Like it would kill him/her to stop surfing Black Planet for 10 minutes and assist you. I mean, PhattButt98 isn't going anywhere.
While walking from the parking garage to work, you pass a corner where a bunch of teenagers pontificate on life. You are astounded by their ability to break life down into three elements, no not earth, wind, and fire, but: bitches, niggas, and money. And they had an uncanny talent--no matter what the conversation, the most obscene words were always spoken the loudest. Shouldn't they be in school somewhere, anywhere?
You hurry home to meet the guy putting in your new ceramic tile in the kitchen--you went out of your way to hire an African-American owned company—doing your part to keep black dollars in our community. He doesn't show up—doesn't call. You call his cell—its off and the mailbox is full. And while he may not have had time to show up for the job he clearly had a window of downtime earlier that day in which he cashed your check.
You check your email. You are bombarded with the latest batch of "ghetto" pictures from your friends. Photos of women and men who have taken to adopting pimps and ho's as their fashion role models. Kids are now going to proms in outfits that could get them arrested in four states. (sigh). And their mama was the one who made it.
You turn on the tube and slip into something more comfortable.
I love New York is on.
You check your voice mail. The person you met last night at the grocery store has three kids by three people.
Flava of Love. Cribs. Maury.
Still not having made the move to Netflix, you head to the video store and as you stand in line a too-young African-American pregnant girl is feeding her two year old a Twix bar and Nehi grape and cursing him out.
You head to your car, you feel low. Are you depressed? are you angry? You can't quite put your finger on what you're feeling. That feeling, my friends, is called being Nigga'd Out. That feeling of dread that makes you look around at our community and say to yourself, we're doomed. You wanna holla and throw up both your hands, but you just don't have the energy.
But there is a cure for this common malady. Its called a Black People Re-fill (BPR). Just when you think there is no more hope for the black community, a BPR can bring you right back and restore your faith in this beautiful race. This is not to be confused with CPR although they both bring you back to life.
No need to consult your physician, you can find a BPR in any city on any evening or weekend. Go to a neighborhood street festival or a museum or a gospel concert. Go to an African-American museum, a soul food restaurant. See some African dancers or a children's choir. Go see an August Wilson play or rent Uptown Saturday Night with Cosby and Poitier. Go see a Romare Bearden art exhibit or a local rendition of Porgy and Bess. Listen to Barack Obama or Cornel West speak. Read Walter Moseley, Toni Morrison or Henry Louis Gates.
A good BPR exposes you to all the beautiful things about us that are eclipsed by a suffocating popular culture. You are reminded that there are people living well, giving back, setting the standard, striving for excellence, providing examples for our children. All hope is not indeed lost.
A BPR lifts your spirits and once again brings you back to the place where you believe all things are possible. A place where you can see that the souls of black folk are among the most beautiful and vibrant in the world. A place where we are kind to each other, embrace our culture and strive for excellence at all times. A place where we are strong and value life and family.
With all the negativity in the world—some imposed, some self-inflicted, it is important you know that a BPR is only as far away as your city newspaper or the internet. Grab onto a BPR and hold it tight during those days when you get down on yourself and down on your people.
Like CPR, a BPR breathes life back into the potential of the black race. I got mine ready, do you have yours?
Because more than likely, you're gonna need it. Soon.






32 comments:
Excellent post! I love it.
Coquinegra
Interesting post. I was reading this out loud to my girlfriend and halfway through she said "let me guess she is going to say how much she hates her people". I am glad it turned into a positive message.
Thanks,
j
I think that you are right, i mean I have had moments like that when I am just like... "NIGGAS", I love my people but sometimes...
Tell it!
My friend forwarded your post to me.
That was a great post.
And it is so true.
We need to be reminded.
http://www.theblackactor.com/
love your blog so far.
Make sure you check us out at:
www.ohellnawl.blogspot.com
you'll be glad ya did.
btw, your blog title is SO on point.
I needed that....running my webpage can shock me with the state of our people...but this was a good pick me up!
You are my soulmate LOL. the post and the title of this blog are on point. I've been trying to tell peole that Conversate is not a word for years. But they look ate me like I'm the ingorant one. lol
You are my soulmate LOL. the post and the title of this blog are on point. I've been trying to tell peole that Conversate is not a word for years. But they look ate me like I'm the ingorant one. lol
I agree with you 110%. I am sick and tired of niggas too! What we need is a nationwide Nigga Test. Because I think most niggas don't know that they're niggas. We could get sponsorship from Alize, Cadillac and Jiffy cornbread. The test would consist of 10 questions. I.e. Do all your kids have different last names? Do your wear house-shoes more than 50 yards from your house? Were you and your mother ever pregnant at the same time? Now, if a brother or sister gets 7 out of 10, they're a nigga! Then we get them help.
This post had me dyin. I live in Harlem so I get a balance of both worlds. The hopeless brothers on the corner with their prison drawers exposed and the Jazz clubs and Museums that keep me loving being black and proud.
* Dead * at Neigh grape juice and tater chips..
NIGGAS need to get out of the way so BLACK PEOPLE can take over....
Ok, I don't want to sound like some kind of ass-kisser, but it only took 3 post to officially make me a fan ;)
For real, with DC changing the way that it is right now, there's a dual need for BRPs. Between Nigga'd out and the bullshit that comes with Gentrification, I keep a steady supply of places to go for Black People Re-fills!
ok, so i don't come to this site much, BUT this post was a great read! I'm not of the black race, but i'd just like to say this piece was refreshing, and i'm copy it to my african american friends. all i can say is "Keep on keeping on!". God bless America (all of it)
I really think that what you said should strike a cord with African American people. It's time for a change. Well said and THANK YOU!
Well done! This was an excellent post! You are right on point.
I just found this post today and I absolutely love it!!! It's like you're reading my mind. I used to feel this way everyday I went to work at my old job. I'm sure they thought I was uppity or something because I couldn't and wouldn't join the morning conversations discussing last night's episode of I Love New York.
Thank you for that amazing post, I really needed that after the day I had.
I feel that way all the time! This post was on point. I use to think I was strange for feeling that way towards my OWN race.
You forgot to check out a nice jazz set for a BPR.
Goes to show how much the institution of slavery really f'd us up for the generations after it. It set us up to be the way we are and the "niggas" are actually not just those poor people you mentioned in your piece but it is also those uppity blacks who turn a blind eye to the "niggas." Failed education, health, housing, inequities to resources have totally failed us, which which will keep turning out more & more "niggas" if we don't do something about it. The struggle continues!
WONDERFUL! I'm glad you've coined these phrases. I'd been tired of being Nigga'd Out and actively seeking and finding some BPR but never knew what to call them...thank you.
Wow...
I had to just sit back and take that in. I love the fact that we are starting to see the problem, but that is step 1 of 7 of the problem solving process. Now we have to work toward a solution. And thank you for the BPR, because today had me almost flatline.
As one strong black woman to another...you are my BPR!!
Like "MO" said, people think you're too high and mighty when you're not up on your I LOVE NEW YORK episode-by-episode buffoonery. I hate New York! I hate everything she represents, everything the people on the show represent and am depressed that people actually keep watching it like it's quality TV. I am at least across the board. I hate all "reality TV" from Big Brother to Survivor to Keeping Up with the Kardashians to I Love New York. The underlying purpose of all of these shows is to spotlight hoeing and the extent to which people will go to win money and fame.
SAD!
Wow....that message was just what I needed. Its good to have someone share your same sentiments about the state of black pop culture. It was as if he spoke for me! Refreshing! The thing is I have become exhausted and maybe even have needed a BPR because I have tried to discuss these issues with perceivably intelligent Afr Amer graduate students and I was shock to see the general disinterest, incompassionate, and unrealistic views that they had of our social condition.
Wow!
I've felt this way for so long but didn't know what to call it.
Thank you for giving a name to the affliction.
I wish your web address would be something more white people would check out. If you are nigga'd out you should try seeing all this and being white. I have always loved black people and kept them close to me my whole life. As much as my black friends say I am an honorary black person I am not black. I am very much aware of that. So when I see what you are describing it's hard for me to remember that there are just as many white people that do the same thing and it is not the best example of black people. One of my good black friends is an attorney and another who runs a multi million dollar business. Those are the best examples. But I am not black so I have a hard time looking at the "niggas" and thinking I love you and I want you to do better. To remember when you know better you do better, that I pulled myself out of the gutter and being white helped- a lot. The one thing that helped me the most though was not being a victim to any of the circumstances that got me in the bad shape I was in. Nigga is another word for victim. Stop being a victim and you stop being a nigga. Victims think it's everyone elses fault and I can't do ANYTHING to get myself out of this mess. That I can make a better decision for my life and pull myself out of any situation. But don't get me wrong, being white helps and thats a shame. But in this world, human nature says somebody has to be down so another can be up. Until we all learn that we are here to give and not take thats the way this world is going to turn. The ego is in-charge here and not our hearts. "Be the change you want to see in the world" is one of my favorite quotes. I think it says it all.
I definitely agree that the behavior i described crosses all color lines. Hotghettomess.com also has an alternate URL called wegot2dobetter.com for those for whom typing in the words hot ghetto mess offends their sensibilities. So spread the word....
HAHAHAHA!!! I love you!!! Not literally, but you know what I mean. It is so true. I shake my head whenever I see people acting like that. It pisses me off more when a white person acts how you described and says they are "blacker than me" because I speak like I am working on my degree. Excuse me, I didn't realize that speaking and acting in a manner that is respectable and honorable wasn't "black." I have my own cure. I watch movies starring Cuba, Morgan, Denzel, Angela, Ruby, Ossie, etc. I listen to Jill, Musiq, Aaliyah, Stevie, Marvin, Donny, etc. I watch the Boondocks (Aaron exposes the ignorance that our people have been displaying ie: "Trial of R. Kelly," "Return of the King"). I watch sermons spoken by respectable black pastors. It refreshes you.
Girl you are too funny. The mom giving the child a twix and a nehi. I got a visual and couldn't stop laughing.
It's sad, but funny.
I just read a good book, that has nothing to do with this reality. Kinda goes back to your blog about watching non-reality shows to escape all too true issues like these.
I was with you until you mentioned Uptown Saturday Night and Porgy and Bess (which was written by Gershwin and Heyward -- no BPR in sight beyond the performers).
Personally, a dose of Jamaica Kinkaid, Ishamel Reed or Cecil Brown does me better than Morrison (despite the sexism of the last two), but that's a matter of preferring fiction that doesn't moralize by subterfuge. We have our own aesthetic nihilists, thanks, who have the self-preservation and creativity not to confuse autobiography with fiction.
Love your post. White man who came across your blog. I wish more of us could understand that generalizations are not accurate. I get angry at the same things, but I realize that doesn't apply to each person of a racial or ethnic group. Made me think a little harder. Thanks
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